Hello Again & Diving into Divine Feminine

I have been away for some time now.  I have struggled with the pressure have having to blog and inspire and create a list of followers, knowing that this wasn’t truly my purpose. So I have resisted the ‘should’ and ‘have to’ of bogging regularly.

I AM here to inspire and teach and to reach many, but for me it has to come from a place that feels authentic and in alignment with my heart and purpose.

So I thought I would share today a bit of what I have been going through.

For the past year I have been in deep immersion with the frequency of divine feminine, of the Goddess.

What the heck does that mean?!?  Well I am still learning, but here is what I can tell you from my experience.

I have lived my life primarily guided by shoulds and the outward perceptions of what others might think of me.  I have been goal and achievement oriented and often relied on outward recognition to feel validated.  My life has ben pretty fast paced, voraciously consuming knowledge and tackling my goals. This is what I think of as Divine Masculine energy.

But what about my inner needs?  What about the flow of life, what about radical self acceptance and allowing myself to just be?  That is were the energy of Divine Feminine comes in.

We, and the whole of the universe are created by the polarity of yin and yang, Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine energies.  It is this polarity that rules creation, the seasons, birth and death, our breath, our impulses, etc. This is not gender-based, both men and women possess both of these energies.

But for the last couple of thousand centuries, humanity has been out of balance, living a more yang/masculine lifestyle. When our environment, both external and internal, is out of balance, it can only last so long until we start to feel the effects.  Externally we see this in the degradation of the environment and social unrest with how our social structures function and internally I feel it as exhaustion, depletion, fatigue, inertia and illness.

I am really tired and have been for a loooooong time.

Attuning with Divine Feminine is not about trying to outweigh the masculine energy that also resides with me, it is about focusing on the feminine, so as to build it up so that the masculine doesn’t need to work so hard any more, it is about finding equilibrium.  It is similar to when you are really hot, you find some where to cool off to find homeostasis, what feels right.

For me this has been a process of slowing down, of looking deeply within and asking what is really true for me? What do I value?  What is important in my life?  And letting go of the falsitudes: I need to be making lots of money, I need to be achieving and accomplishing to be worthy, I need to be busy and publishing.  And oh has a war raged on!!!!  Because my ego-self is really attached to the falsitudes.

But I now feel the old pieces crumbling.

This past year I have used my masculine to deep dive into the feminine – I took a Radiant Women’s Circle Training, I was initiated into the 13 Moon Mystery School (Priestess Training), I started the Sacred Sisterhood Women’s Circle Gatherings, I joined a spiritual business Mastermind focused on sisterhood, I was initiated into the Egyptian Goddess Lineage, I finished my Third Year of Eden Energy Medicine to become a Clinical Practitioner…OOOH my ego sure loves to see me typing all of that out!!!  Does it ever feel validated 😉

All the while, I have been teaching my students and clients about the need to soften into our feminine (both men and women), to find the equilibrium between both pieces, to not try so hard, no nurture and care for themselves. And I have been consciously TRYING to practice it myself.

But here’s the thing – being in my feminine energy is not about trying.  It is not efforting with an end goal in mind. Rather it is a continued practice of dropping into sacred space and re-establishing what it is I need to feel loved and supported and nurtured.

From a societal and cultural point of view I have accomplished a lot.  And I am grateful for what I have ‘achieved’.  But I have suffered – my immune system has taken a hit and I have been sick more than I have been healthy. This current bout is a flu-turned-cold-turned-bronchitis-turned-cold for the past 7 weeks.  I get the message. It is time for me to integrate all of the external, brain-oriented learning and really feel it deeply on a cellular level, embody it and live it.

And from this place I fill my cup, I am in alignment with my Divine Feminine and I am truly taking care of myself. From this deep place of softness I can draw upon my fiery determined masculine energy to get what I desire to get done.

It has taken repeated lengthy illnesses this year for me to finally understand what is being asked of me and how I need to do things differently.

This fall I am creating a program called Sacred Alignment that will likely be offered next February.  I am calling in a select group of women who want to embody the feminine and who are ready to show up fully with love and compassion for themselves.  I don’t know exactly what it will look like yet or what format it will take.  The Goddess is fluid and reveals herself when the time is right.

I am eager to share my learnings with you as I deepen into the field of the Goddess, of Divine Yin Feminine energy.

Today as we sit in the energy of the new moon, moving into the first phase of the waxing crescent, I invite you to drop into the energy of the Goddess of Compassion.

                How can you show yourself love and compassion today?

For myself, I am drinking homemade chai tea and resting my sick body. Click over to my blog for the recipe.

With love,

Maria

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